[jack]
listen, there were objects so peculiar
they were not to be believed
all around, things to tantalize my brain
Itand's a world unlike anything iand've ever seen
and as hard as i try
i canand't seem to describe
like a most improbable dream
But you must believe when i tell you this
itand's as real as my skull and it does exist
here, let me show you
This is a thing called a present
the whole thing starts with a box
[devil]
a box?
is it steel?
[werewolf]
are there locks?
[harleouin demon]
is it filled with a pox?
[devil, werewolf, harlequin demon]
a pox
how delightful, a pox
[jack]
if you please
just a box with bright-colored paper
and the whole thingand's topped with a bow
[witches]
a bow?
but why?
how ugly
whatand's in it?
whatand's in it?
[jack]
thatand's the point of the thing, not to know
[clown]
itand's a bat
will it bend?
[creature under the stairs]
itand's a rat
will it break?
[undersea gal]
perhaps it s the head that i found in the lake
[jack]
listen now, you donand't understand
thatand's not the point of christmas land
Now, pay attention
now we pick up an oversized sock
and hang it like this on the wall
[mr. hyde]
oh, yes! does it still have a foot?
[medium mr. hyde]
let me see, let me look
[small mr. hyde]
is it rotted and covered with gook?
[jack]
hmm, let me explain
thereand's no foot inside, but thereand's candy
or sometimes itand's filled with small toys
[mummy and winged demon]
small toys
[winged demon]
do they bite?
[mummy]
do they snap?
[winged demon]
or explode in a sack?
[corpse kid]
or perhaps they just spring out
and scare girls and boys
[mayor]
what a splendid idea
this christmas sounds fun
why, i fully endorse it
letand's try it at once
[jack]
everyone, please now, not so fast
thereand's something here that you donand't quite grasp
well, i may as well give them what they want
And the best, i must confess, i have saved for the last
for the ruler of this christmas land
is a fearsome king with a deep mighty voice
least thatand's what iand've come to understand
And iand've also heard it told
that heand's something to behold
like a lobster, huge and red
and sets out to slay with his rain gear on
carting bulging sacks with his big great arms
that is, so iand've heard it said
And on a dark, cold night
under full moonlight
he flies into a fog
like a vulture in the sky
and they call him sandy claws
Well, at least theyand're excited
though they donand't understand
that special kind of feeling in christmas land
oh, well...
