Now this may sound disgusting anand' like very gross
But itand's sure to have your trippinand'
So yand'all listen close
Itand's not bright as the sun or sweet like sugar
But itand's rather on the bug tip and itand's called pickinand' boogers
Now what iand'm emceeinand' might not seem kosher to you
But itand's still somethinand' we all have to do
So go up your nose with a finger or two
And pull out one or a crusty crew
Yo, donand't try to front like itand's so gloomy and gray
and'cause we all pick our boogers sometime every day
Whether out in the open or on a sneak tip
With a finger, tissue, or even a q-tip
Take it from the biz markie because iand'm jokinand'
And also, remember this slogan
andquot;hey, ma, whatand's for dinner?
Go up your nose and pick yourself a winnerandquot;
Pickinand' boogers
Pickinand' boogers
Let me tell you what happened on the train, man
I was coolinand' one say with my partner kane
Headed up to the rooftop, ridinand' the d train
When the man sittinand' next to me was so profane
Heand'd stick his finger up his nose, then do a drain
(you should and'a moved)
I was just about, but al of a suddern, homeboy just pulled out
A big, green, slimey - naw, iand'm not even gonna say it
But it weighed a good pound if you tried to weigh it
He sat there for a while with it in his hand
So i tried to play cool like a normal man
So i laid my head back to catch a quick nap
All of a sudden he plucked it dead in my lap
Now kane sat there laughinand' like it was all a joke
But a brother like biz markie had almost choked
So i dug up my nose and pulled out about five
And plucked every last one of them dead in his eye
Then the man jumped up and said whatand's wrong with you
And wiped and'em off his face and said i canand't mess with you
Like if i did somethinand' that was so full of shame
But yo, you got to know the name of the game
Pickinand' boogers
Pickinand' boogers
Now let me take you trippinand' dow memory lane
Back in public school with my partner kane
When i was class clown and he was my brotherr
Sittinand' at the desk, pluckinand' boogers at each other
Never do our work as we were supposed
and'cause we was too busy digginand' up our nose
And in the lunch room, we would talk about rude
God forbid the person that had to leave his food
No matter who you are, we didnand't give a damn
We even put teachers down with the program
Whether it was a woman or if youand're a man
We put boogers in our fingers then shake your hand
Catch anyone from anywhere
But the best part about itand's catchinand' kane out there
Especially weand're out playinand' ball in the gym
I put boogers on the basketball and pass it to him
Now weand're grown up and things have changed
But we still be playinand' the pickinand' boogers game
Just last night when kane was gettinand' ready
I slippped a litte green one inside his spaghetti
Pickinand' boogers
Pickinand' boogers
Let me tell you what happened with this girl
One night at latin quarters, i was standinand' at ease
And saw a gorgeous yound lady that i wanted to skeeze
I didnand't show enough that i really did want it
So, no half-steppinand', i pushed up on it
Pulled out the gold cable and a knot that was fat
Had a spotlight beaminand' on my biz markie hat
But when she stepped in the light and she got real close
I saw a teeny-weenie booger on the tip of her nose
She was dressed real def and her body was hook
But that dried-up boogeer just ruined the look
I wanted to tell her about it but i couldnand't be bold
So i played it off and said, andquot;thatand's a cute green moleandquot;
I was hopinand' from that she wuld wipe it away
But she didnand't do nothinand', i guess she wanted it displayed
I said, andquot;before you get my number i donand't mean to dis you
But write it in your hand because youand're gonna need the tissueandquot;
